Pet Peeve

Dear people guilty of the following behavior,

Stop doing this.

Scenario: You and I are next to each other in a packed subway that’s making its way down the tracks. You’re standing somewhere not directly in front of the doors and need to get off at the next stop. You’re extremely concerned about not being able to make your way past people in time to get out (even though I have yet to see this actually happen to anyone). At this point, you feel the need to say “excuse me” or otherwise point out that you’d like me to move before the train stops moving.

That last point is essential. Once the doors are open and I’m in your way, feel free to ask me to move, or tap my shoulder, or shove me to the side; I’ll understand.

What I don’t understand is what you expect me to do about your imminent departure while the train is in motion. The goddamn car is full of people! Where do you want me to move to? Not only that, but half the time when you do this to me, I’m also getting out at the next stop. Dare to imagine a world where you’re not the only person who has to maneuver their way out of the car soon. I know it looks like it’s impossible for you to get out, but that’s because it is. The doors are closed. The train is moving. Try to understand that when those conditions change, people will get out, and you can be one of them.

I’m not ignoring you because I don’t see your premature gesturing towards the door. I’m ignoring you because you’re stupid.